The Never Ending Story

That is what I feel my life is right now.

I'm so very drained and I am exhausted. It's not like I'm tired exhausted, just simply exhausted.

We have not been in our home for the past 8 day. We spent two nights and three days at the hotel. Staying at the hotel made this whole ordeal feel a little like a breath of fresh air. We had the opportunity to spend time together as a family and enjoyed just being able to relax. But ever since Tuesday we have had this roller coaster ride.

Though I absolutely appreciate our friends allowing us to stay with them, it was very difficult to remain calm and quiet when there where major discipline issues that arose. I am not or will I ever claim to be a perfect parent, but there are basic things we as parents need to do for our children and one of which is discipline. It was quite exhausting emotionally and I left feeling drained with a stress headache.

Since Friday afternoon we have be residing in Salem at my brothers. This has actually been in the process for some time now, long before the ceiling issue even came about. For many, many reasons (i.e. gaining some ground financially, unable to find a home that suits our needs, helping my brother and his family out in return...)we began praying about moving in with them. I was not out on a hunt to find confirmation that this was where we were to go, but confirmation came in many different forms. So, we were already planning on moving to my brother's at the end of July but do to the current circumstances we began making the move a bit early.

So far, the move-in has been pretty smooth. My only issue is privacy. They have a semi-finished basement that my brother worked on getting ready for us and that is our space. It's quite nice actually. We have a sleeping area for us and the kids, we have an area that is a "kitchen" where we have a small fridge, our deep freezer, a small round table with four chairs, we have our microwave, coffee pot, toaster oven, and other various kitchen items there. We also have a "living room" where there is entire set up with a large 30something inch TV (larger than we've ever owned!), surround sound, DVD player, couch, chairs...you get the picture. My brother installed a lock on the door that on he and his wife and Mike and I have access to the only keys. He even, and I laugh as I type this, got a small wireless doorbell. It's pretty funny. So, it is all working out, but it nonetheless has it's moments. We will have some glitches we will need to work out but I know we've made the right decision.

I just feel so unsure. I know that life is full of uncertainties but it doesn't mean I have to like it! I wish I knew where we would be next week or next month. I know there is one thing I am certain of and that is that God has a lesson in this somewhere. I enjoyed a wonderful conversation with my brother yesterday morning over coffee as we watched the sun come up. We talked about faith and that even though we do not know what tomorrow brings we can trust that God has it all figured out even if we don't. I am resting in knowing that God orders our steps and that those who "Trust in the Lord, with all of their heart, lean not on your their understanding...in all of their ways acknowledge Him...He will make your paths straight." My paraphrasing of course, but that is what I am clinging to.

I must go. My daughter is getting into things and it is about dinner time and I must figure out what we are going to do. Have a wonderful week everyone. TTFN