The past couple of days I've had the anxiety issues creep up again. I've been doing really, really well and thankfully so. But every so often I have a few days of struggling against the awful feelings that make me feel fearful, even though I know there is nothing to fear. It's a tough battle that I wish was over. But I gladly sit here typing this post knowing it is only momentary and that this will pass as it does every other time. It's just reminding myself this that's the problem. It's a tough thing to explain and understand. Unless you have battled anxiety, it's hard to really understand the torment it brings.
But again, I know that it will pass. God has brought me so far and I'm not going back to where I was. I can only move forward. I know that I WILL break free from this. I am so thankful for the healing that I have already had over this and I know I will eventually be completely free from it.
In the meantime, I am walking this out. Facing the fact that I have to go into work tonight makes it a bit of a challenge. It's easier to fight this war with those who know and can be a support. Or to fight in the comforts of my own surroundings. But it's different at work. I have to put on my "librarian" face and face the public knowing that my mind is a mess. That's when prayer is my biggest key to fighting and winning over this war. So, my mind has been focused on His mercies and knowing God's peace is what will bring me through the night.
Sorry for such a downer post for today. It feels good though, to get it out there. Helps to not always feel so alone.
On that note I must head off to start getting ready.
Until tomorrow my friends...
2 comments:
Praying for you! Love you<3
Thank you lord for your healing power and grace! God is greater than anxiety! Anxiety is a torment only known to those of us that have suffered from it. But victory is ours through God, who is faithful when we call on His name, and brings the healing and empowerment.
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