Faith Through Disappointment

As those who follow me on Twitter know, there was a day last week in which I tweeted "Lord give me peace I'm not sure I can take this!" I was blind-sighted by information that had me in a tailspin.  My head could not wrap around what was going on in my life at the moment.

Though for now the details I can not disclose, it is suffice to say that some choices made by someone close to me have not been good.  Bad, very bad choices over the course of many years are now causing an explosion within my family's dynamics. There is nothing like having an entire foundation rattled and shaken.  Sadly the individual making these choices only thought of themselves and never thought about how it would effect everyone around them, even if it was years down the road.

For a good hour I was highly emotional and felt the effects physically.  I knew at one point I knew my blood pressure was high and decided to check it and it was 126/101.  My body was in shock (I think) over what was going down.  I had to contact someone close to me and entrust them with the details of what was going on.  I am so very thankful that God has placed some wonderful, understanding people in my life.  I prayed hard, harder than I knew I could.  It was through God's peace and Him using someone close to me that I was able to find peace.  True, Godly peace truly is a peace that surpasses ALL understanding.


"And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phillippians 4:7

Since all of this happened almost a week ago, I have been continuing to walk in peace. I found it funny (once the shock wore off) that just the night before all of this happened I had been praying and asking God to help deliver me and bring me through this anxiety that has still had a bit of a hold on me.  I told the Lord "I am ready to face this head on. Do whatever it takes for me to overcome it. Bring it on Lord!"  I seriously laughed OUT LOUD when I realized this the very next day.  He is with me and had given me the strength to face this head on.


"God is our Refuge and Strength [mighty and impenetrable to temptation], a very present and well-proved help in trouble."  Psalm 46:1




All this has just proven more to me the changes that God is wanting to make in me.  Though what is happening around me is not about me, God can still use this as a way to touch my heart and heal me.  I have faith that in the end, once this is all said and done (and it could be a very long time before that happens) God is going to bring about the best in all of us involved IF we allow Him.

"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."  Romans 8:28


I am so thankful for a loving God who sees it fit to use me, strength me, and guide me even when I haven't always cooperated.  I'm thankful for the trails that we have to endure because with out going through the fire we can never be strengthened.  And for that I will continue to have faith. I will continue to praise God through the storm. And I will thank Him through it all.